Counter-Offers: When to Make Them and When to Let Go

Before thinking about any offer, have an honest one-to-one. Thank them for telling you directly, avoid sounding hurt or angry, and ask open questions. Listen more than you speak.

People rarely leave for just one reason. The new salary is often the trigger, but behind it there may be months of frustration about workload, lack of growth, a difficult manager, a long commute or feeling unappreciated.

Give yourself a day to think before responding. A rushed counter-offer made in the same meeting, out of panic, is often one you later regret. Tell the employee you appreciate the conversation and will come back to them shortly, then talk to whoever needs to approve any change.

• What made you start looking?
• When did you first think about leaving?
• What does the new role offer that you do not have here?
• If you could change one thing about your job here, what would it be?
• Is this decision final, or is there something that would make you stay?

A counter-offer is worth considering when the answers point to something specific and fixable, and when the person is someone you would actively hire again tomorrow.

Be honest with yourself about the last point. If you were not planning to promote or raise this person before they resigned, ask why — and whether that reason still holds.

• Their pay has fallen clearly below the market for the role — see our salary benchmarking guide
• They want more responsibility and you have a genuine role to give them
• A specific problem can be solved: shift timing, location, workload, a reporting change
• They hold critical knowledge and replacement would be slow and risky
• They are a strong performer with a good record, not just an urgent gap

Some resignations should simply be accepted, with good grace. Trying to hold on in these cases usually just delays the exit by a few months and leaves everyone frustrated.

Letting go well matters too. A former employee who leaves on good terms may refer candidates, become a client or even return later.

• The real reason is the manager or culture, and that will not change quickly
• They are moving for a career step you cannot offer: new field, bigger role, different city
• Matching the salary would put them far above peers doing similar work
• Their performance or commitment had already been slipping
• They have resigned before and stayed after a counter-offer, and are leaving again

A counter-offer solves today's problem but can create new ones. Other employees may learn that resigning is the way to get a raise. Colleagues who stayed loyal at lower pay may feel cheated. Trust between the manager and the employee can also change after a resignation.

There is also the question of whether the employee will stay. If the underlying reasons were not addressed, they may continue looking. Many recruiters advise candidates to be cautious about accepting counter-offers for exactly this reason.

If you decide to make one, make it quickly, make it once and make it about more than money. Address the actual reasons they gave you.

Do not pressure or guilt the employee, and do not make promises you cannot keep — such as a promotion 'next year' with no clear criteria. Put the revised terms in writing.

Also consider timing. A counter-offer made a week after the resignation, once the employee has already mentally moved on and told the new employer they are joining, rarely works. If you are going to counter, do it in the first conversation or within a day or two.

Involve only the people who need to know. Discussing a resignation widely before deciding how to respond can embarrass the employee and make a fair conversation harder.

1. 1Meet within a day or two of the resignation
2. 2Summarise what you heard: 'You want to lead a team, and your pay has fallen behind'
3. 3Present a specific offer: revised pay, new role or responsibilities, timeline
4. 4Explain why you value them, with concrete examples
5. 5Give them a short, fair time to think
6. 6Confirm the outcome in writing either way

Counter-offers also affect you when you are the hiring employer. A candidate who accepted your offer may receive one during their notice period. Prepare for this from the start.

During interviews, ask what would make them stay at their current employer. At the offer stage, discuss counter-offers openly: 'If your company offers more to keep you, how would you think about it?' During the notice period, stay in regular contact and remind them of the reasons they chose you. Our guide on making a job offer covers this in more detail.

The best defence is to address issues before people resign. Review pay against the market every year, especially for roles in high demand. Hold regular one-to-ones where employees can raise concerns. Create clear growth paths, even in small teams.

Stay interviews — short conversations asking good employees what keeps them and what might make them leave — often surface problems early. See our guide on reducing employee attrition for more ideas.

Declining to make a counter-offer does not have to be awkward. Thank the employee sincerely for their work and for telling you directly. Say that you respect their decision and want the handover and exit to go smoothly.

A simple line works: "We will miss you, and I understand why this is a good move for you. Let us plan a proper handover, and you are welcome to stay in touch." Then follow through: process the full and final settlement on time, give a fair experience and relieving letter, and tell the team about the change yourself rather than letting rumours spread.

Ask whether they would be open to returning in future, and whether they know anyone who might suit the role. Departing employees who were treated well are often generous with referrals. Keep their contact details, with their consent, and note the reasons they gave for leaving so you can address them for the next person in the role.

Once a resignation is accepted, start the replacement immediately rather than waiting for the last working day. Use the notice period for handover, documentation and, ideally, overlap with the new hire.

Rewrite the role based on what you learned from the exit. On BetterJobs you can post a job from a one-line description in about five minutes, get an AI-written job description to edit, and have it appear on BetterJobs and Google Jobs, giving you a head start while the outgoing employee is still serving notice.